SEVILLA + JUAN

I went to Sevilla with 5 other girls two weekends ago. It took 6 1/2 hrs to get there by bus and we stayed for two days and one night. The trip was fantastic because Sevilla is the most pure Spanish you can get. They have bull fighting (not for me), Flamenco (yes please), the third largest cathedral in the world, and a ginormous tower with ramps instead of stairs (so I was able to ride my pony Tater up it).

I apparently made this rainbow... all in a day's work.

At night we went to a Flamenco show and it was as if the dancer was dancing for the very last time and her babies' lives depended on her stomp. I was sitting next to a group of guys and I quickly discovered that one of them was part of the original creators of FACEBOOK! (So, he is a gazillionaire). After word spread about who he was, all of the girls around us were throwing themselves at him with the best flirting i've witnessed since my middle school dances. I, on the other hand, could only think to say, "What were you thinking with the mini-feed?!" (for those of you who don't know, the mini-feed is the home page of facebook that let's you see what everyone in the galaxy is currently thinking, seeing, kissing, dissing, etc.). smooth. real smooth.

Anyway, the best part of the trip was the bus ride home. Here are the higlights:

1. I sit down next to Juan, a seemingly harmless and jovial bald man.

2. I smile at Juan and say something cliche about the weather.

3. Juan opens up to me about being a sailor, getting divorced from a cheating witch, wanting to send Bush to the guillotine, and cohabilitating with an out-of-the-ordinary ugly woman. (hr 1-2)

4. Juan busts out a package of HACHISH from his pocket and explains 6 different recipes that I could back weed into (the potato omelette is particulary captivating). (hr 3)

5. the bus stops for a break

6. Juan apparently gets the munchies and buys two of everything in the convenience store and demands that I feast with him. I manage to down 2 ho-hos and a strawberry milkshake out of pure terror....but the milkshake was delicious. (hr 4)

7. The conversation turns to faith, and Juan shows me 3 tattoos of Jesus' face that are on his arms...i didn't ask to view the other 2 Jesus tattoos. He then explains a time that he was floating in the ocean for 36 hrs after his boat sunk...where he first saw the face of God. (hr 5)

8. To top it off, during hour 6 Juan sang to me....and the rest of the bus I suppose.

C***

So I was crazy blessed to go to Paris last weekend...and I've been thinking about what I want to say about the most beautiful city in the world...but something traumatic happened today that overshadows my vacation.

I had to write a 8 pg paper for philopsophy in spanish, and since I went to France I only had a day and a half to write it. shoot.

So I managed to finish it early this morning before class started...and then I had to write another paper for a different class and I only had 25 minutes. So my state was "uncalm", to put it gracefully.

I wrote about my weekend in Paris and I said that I had lunch with Quasimodo on top of Notre Dame and we talked about Esmeralda and croissants...you know, French things. And then I said that we went to the Eiffle Tower, but that the lines were too big to wait in....

Later in the day I had to say the word "line" (cola) to a Spaniard, but I actually said "ass" (culo). shoot! Then realization hit me that I had said "culo" instead of "cola" in my paper!!!!!

So, my professora is at home reading my paper about Quasimodo and I checking out the big asses by the Eiffle tower.

Monday's class should be fantastic.

Marcos

So fate has brought me together with a Spanish man. Here is the story:

Friday afternoon. enter Alex, the apartment mate, frantically saying something about Victoria, our Senora.

Alex: Katie! Oh no! Victoria just called me and told me that she is in Barcelona and that she wants me to come! I can't go to Barcelona and I think that she is mad at me!

Katie: uh?

Alex: She said that then I need to go to Acuna with her...did she call you?

Katie: uh?

Alex: Well, I will call her....

Katie is now thinking...who's gonna make me my dinner?! shoot!
Alex calls Victoria but her phone suddenly runs out of minutes...so Katie steps in and calls Victoria...(plot thickens)

Katie: Hola! Are you in Barcelona right now? You never said anything about leaving and we are a little confused.

Phone voice: Yes I am in Barcelona, working! I am going to Acuna and I am expecting you to come.

Katie: Uh....well, I am going to stay here this weekend because I have a class trip. I didn't know that you had a job. So....what about dinner...can we use food in the kitchen to make something?

Phone Voice: What! Where are you from, and where are you right now!

Katie: I'm at the house and I'm from the USA...awkward laugh...this isn't Victoria, is it.

Phone Voice: No!!! This is Marcos.

conversation ends in a frantic and extremely awkward apology...Katie now realizing that she asked a random man if she could eat the food in his kitchen.

Reflection:
Only I would manage to call a man and honestly believe that he was a my Spanish mother. Only my roommate and I would manage to put a random man's phone number in our phone book and label it Victoria. Really? really.

ps...I have no intention of pursuing a relationship with Marcos in the future.

pps...Victoria arrived safely at home 6 minutes later.